I had to take a break. I felt overextended and overwhelmed. I still do really but I think I’m at a point where I neeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeed to write again - where I need to share.
That said, here it goes.
I have given birth to 3 daughters and I love them all dearly and closely and hard. But in 3 different ways. I know that where there is love, there is fear. There is the possibility of hurt and anguish that causes hurt and anguish simply by being a possibility. And that sucks. But it is what it is.
i have one daughter who is trying to get herself together as a young woman on her own. She has a roommate and lives far away from me but not too terribly far.. about an hour drive or so. I see her pretty regularly but she has taken on a 2nd part time job that is going to impact the amount of time I get to spend w/ her. At the same time, I can’t shoulder but so much of her finances. She has to get herself together and I can only support as best I can. (She’s the oldest.)
Then you have my 2nd oldest: the 17 yo bipolar beauty who has taken it upon herself to fly the coop early. We talk every now and then mostly because it is too hard on my heart to talk to her too often. I hate that. i really hate that but I know I can’t do her work for her. Even though she is my kid, you know?
Then there is my baby girl. She’s 10 and lives out of state. Her father doesn’t want her to be around me because he questions my Islam. Eff that dude, tho. I’m talking about my daughter. She is amazing and epic and wonderful and I love her. She’s an adolescent now and that is a beautiful thing… even though it scares me to think my wonderful child will be replaced w/ a teenage demon lol.
There was a time when I would have all 3 of my girls together and they would work like siblings do. And they would argue like siblings argue. Now, they are growing and scattering in the wind and I miss them. I mean, to keep it all the way honest, I miss my mommy, too.
Joseph Weinberg & Michael Biernbaum, Conversations of Consent: Sexual Intimacy without Sexual Assault (via cocknbull)
96%…wow just wow.
but someone please tell me how jim crow is over. please. and why the hell we don’t talk about this as an aspect of rape culture.
Let’s remember our herstories and histories: Rape only became a criminal act when white slave masters became afraid of relationships between black male slaves and white female masters. They needed a law that would make it so that a relationship between a black male and a white female could NEVER be adult and consensual even when it was. This, of course, only worked in the white woman’s favor. When the black male was being raped by the white female masters, ONLY the black male slave could be blamed (sound familiar?).
Before AND after that, though, whites continued to rape blacks, female AND male, with reckless abandon. And it was never considered a crime. At worst, it was considered an investment.
Go do some research and see how many white men have raped black women or men. And then research how many of those white rapists were brought to trial and convicted.
You won’t be astonished by what you find. And that’s a damn shame. In the main, rape is a crime when it’s perpetrated AGAINST the white body—especially if perpetrated BY a non-white body.
America is, down to its damned mitochondria, a rape culture.
do people say “bad neighborhood” for cities next to all-white high schools where the boys are getting high every day and raping girls? do they even say “bad neighborhood” for cities with large kkk meetings? or is bad neighborhood a strictly anti-black code?